The good goodbye - Better and better, day by day The final wish Who are you caring for? - Singapore Hospice Council
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JUNE – AUGUST 2021 • MCI (P) 003/10/2020
Better and better,
day by day
The final wish
Who are you
caring for?
The good
goodbye
PLUS
SHC’s Silver
Jubilee
1
THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
CHIEF EXECUTIVE’S NOTE
Members’ Contacts Contents n our hectic everyday life, we are
Alexandra Hospital
378 Alexandra Road, S(159964)
T: 6472 2000 F: 6379 4339
The Palliative Care Centre
for Excellence in Research
and Education (PalC)
I often so busy on-the-go that we do
not take the time to slow down and
think about what it really means
www.ah.com.sg PalC c/o Dover Park Hospice to depart this life. Saying “goodbye” seems like a
AH_Enquiries@nuhs.edu.sg 10 Jalan Tan Tock Seng, S(308436) subjective experience as we know that we could
T: 6500 7269
Assisi Hospice www.palc.org.sg easily move on to the next task.
832 Thomson Road, S(574627) enquiries@palc.org.sg However, saying farewell to your loved ones
T: 6832 2650 F: 6253 5312 will become an important signal when it is at
www.assisihospice.org.sg Ren Ci Hospital
assisi@assisihospice.org.sg 71 Irrawaddy Road, S(329562) the ending point in the life journey together. This
T: 6385 0288 F: 6358 0900 mindful goodbye becomes the hardest thing to
Buddhist Compassion Relief www.renci.org.sg
say to someone who means the world to you,
10
Tzu Chi Foundation (Singapore) renci@renci.org.sg
9 Elias Road, S(519937) especially when we struggle just thinking about
T: 6582 9958 F: 6582 9952 Sengkang General Hospital losing our loved one.
www.tzuchi.org.sg/en 110 Sengkang East Way, S(544886)
T: 6930 6000 It may be easier if we use the conversation
Changi General Hospital www.skh.com.sg cue cards or metaphor phrases to share the last
2 Simei Street 3, S(529889)
T: 6788 8833 F: 6788 0933 Singapore Cancer Society words to make it less uncomfortable and heavy-
www.cgh.com.sg 15 Enggor Street, #04-01, hearted. We should tell or write to our loved
Realty Centre, S(079716) 2 Members’ Contacts ones about:
Dover Park Hospice T: 1800 727 3333
10 Jalan Tan Tock Seng, S(308436) www.singaporecancersociety.org.sg • reconciliation
T: 6500 7272 F: 6258 9007
www.doverpark.org.sg
hospice@singaporecancersociety.org.sg 3 Chief Executive’s Note • forgiveness
info@doverpark.org.sg Singapore General Hospital • love
Department of Internal Medicine, • appreciation
HCA Hospice Care The Academia, Level 4, 4 On your own terms
705 Serangoon Road, Block A #03-01 20 College Road, S(169856) • honour
@Kwong Wai Shiu Hospital, S(328127) T: 6222 3322 We can try to plan ahead and understand
T: 6251 2561 F: 6291 1076 www.sgh.com.sg 6 Better late than never that every individual is unique and has different
www.hca.org.sg sghfeedback@sgh.com.sg
contactus@hcahospicecare.org.sg needs or ways to express their wishes. It is an
SingHealth Community Hospitals 8 My hospice, my home important process and many will find comfort
Khoo Teck Puat Hospital (Bright Vision Hospital,
90 Yishun Central, S(768828) Outram Community Hospital, in having their voices heard and eventually
T: 6555 8000 F: 6602 3700 Sengkang Community Hospital) find closure.
www.ktph.com.sg 10 Hospital Boulevard, S(168582)
10 Who are you caring for?
T: 6970 3000
KK Women’s and www.singhealth.com.sg/SCH
Children’s Hospital 12 A Silver Jubilee Tips for face-to-face, calls or written
100 Bukit Timah Road, S(229899) St. Andrew’s Community Hospital to remember
T: 6225 5554 F: 6293 7933 8 Simei Street 3, S(529895) communication:
www.kkh.com.sg T: 6586 1000
www.sach.org.sg
16 Better and better,
1
Lien Centre for Palliative Care general@sach.org.sg Start off by focusing on the sweet
Duke-NUS
Medical School Singapore St Joseph’s Home
day by day memories and expressing gratitude
8 College Road 36 Jurong West St 24, S(648141)
Level 4, S(169857) T: 6268 0482 F: 6268 4787
“
T: 6601 2034 / 6601 7424 [Education] www.stjh.org.sg 18 A father’s last bus ride
T: 6601 5113 [Research] general@stjh.org.sg Express your emotions openly, seek
www.duke-nus.edu.sg/lcpc
Metta Hospice Care
St Luke’s Hospital
2 Bukit Batok Street 11, S(659674)
20 The final wish 2 forgiveness and not be too formal
with goodbyes
32 Simei Street 1, T: 6563 2281 F: 6561 8205
Metta Building, S(529950) www.slh.org.sg 22 Announcements
T: 6580 4695 F: 6787 7542
www.metta.org.sg
referral@stluke.org.sg
What we have once
hhospice@metta.org.sg Tan Tock Seng Hospital
11 Jalan Tan Tock Seng, S(308433)
24 Leading youth in action / 3 Offer reassurance that you appreciate
the times together
MWS Home Care & Home Hospice
2 Kallang Avenue,
T: 6256 6011
www.ttsh.com.sg
Events calendar enjoyed deeply we
CT Hub #08-14, S(339407)
T: 6435 0270 F: 6435 0274
www.mws.sg/centre-location/
mws-home-care-home-hospice/
Tsao Foundation
298 Tiong Bahru Road
Central Plaza, #15-01/06, S(168730) 4
Remind your loved one of the many
joyful times you’ve shared together
can never lose. All
MWShh@mws.sg T: 6593 9500 F: 6593 9505 that will always be treasured
National Cancer
Centre Singapore
www.tsaofoundation.org
info@tsaofoundation.org that we love deeply
11 Hospital Crescent, S(169610) Woodlands Health Campus
T: 6436 8000 F: 6225 6283
www.nccs.com.sg
9 Maxwell Road,
MND Complex Annex A, Ms Evelyn Leong becomes a part of us.”
#03-01A, S(069112) Chief Executive
Ng Teng Fong General Hospital T: 6681 5999
1 Jurong East Street 21, S(609606) www.whc.sg Singapore Hospice Council HELEN KELLER
T: 6716 2000 F: 6716 5500
www.ntfgh.com.sg
enquiries@juronghealth.com.sg
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THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
COMPLETE
LEAVE WITH
HOME
DIGNITY
CARE
On your own terms SCS adopts the dignity model approach
in helping terminally ill patients to receive care
In using the dignity model of palliative care, Singapore Cancer Society
enables patients to have closure. beyond symptom control.
reserving one’s dignity in To enhance the patient’s sense of Left: Mr Zainal
and his wife
P satisfying a person’s end-
of-life care needs is often
associated with describing
dignity, SCS also checks for any final
wishes the team can help to fulfil. SCS
Living Well Fund supports end-of-life
resting at home;
Below: Haslina
attending to
her father’s
a ‘good death’. Dignity care at Singapore patients who have financial challenges. medical needs
Cancer Society (SCS) focuses on maintaining SCS also partners with Ambulance
one’s dignity in three broad domains Wish Singapore, an independent charity
relating to illness-related concerns, psycho- organisation that helps to actualise final
spiritual wellbeing, and social needs. This requests from terminally ill patients.
approach is also known as the dignity More than 20 patient wishes were
model of palliative care (Chochinov, 2002). fulfilled in the last 12 months. Patients
Addressing this spectrum of needs enables and their families have given feedback
patients to make more informed choices, that the act of wish-granting provided
have better symptom management and a positive end-of-life experience. Our
offer opportunities for working on patients have also expressed a sense of
personal dignity-preserving matters contentment and closure.
for a good closure. In conclusion, the dignity model is how
SCS adopts the dignity model approach in we can make our end-of-life patients
helping terminally ill patients to receive care feel valued, thereby bolstering patients’
beyond symptom control. These are stories dignity in dying to bid their loved ones a
of how SCS supports their patients and good goodbye.
families to maintain their sense of dignity in
a variety of ways.
Seventy-year-old Mr Zainal was diagnosed
with terminal cancer a month before his
90-year-old mother was diagnosed with
cancer. They were both referred to SCS
Hospice Care Services. Mr Zainal’s mother
had a wish to maintain her sense of
autonomy and preferred to pass away at
home with her son and grandchildren by her
side. Mr Zainal wanted to continue his role as
a son to his dying mother and requested for I could have never completed it alone... It’s with the patient to share his thoughts,
symptom control. Mr Zainal also wished to the beautiful kind souls that speak and these hopes and concerns for his daughter.
pass on at home. souls are within the SCS team. My family Through this, the patient was able to have
SCS Hospice Care Services provided and I could never thank these God-sent the opportunity to pass his words and
three months of intensive care and support angels enough. They journeyed with us till legacy down to his daughter with hopes
for both patients and their family to the end”. that she will one day be able to find the
PHOTOS SINGAPORE CANCER SOCIETY
achieve two ‘good goodbyes’ for the family. For some, leaving a legacy for the living closure she needs.
WORDS VIVIAN KOO, FLORINA WONG
Mr Zainal’s daughter, Haslina, was awarded is important in preserving personal dignity. In this pandemic situation, being
the Singapore Health Inspirational Caregiver This may come in the form of a family photo separated from their loved ones overseas
Award 2021 for her courage and resilient album, video, personal memoir, letter, or can exacerbate the sense of grief and loss
spirit in working with SCS to look after her journal. For Mr T, connecting to his daughter for patients. The SCS team recognises
father and grandmother concurrently at was very important. However, Mr T’s the patients’ longing to be reunited with
home, and for demonstrating filial piety in daughter was not emotionally ready to talk loved ones and leveraged on technology
honouring their wishes and dignity till the about his disease and hear his final words to to enable them to connect with their
end. In her letter of appreciation to SCS, she her. As Mr T had wished to have closure with loved ones. Saying their final goodbyes is
wrote: “Looking back, I’ve never realised that his daughter before his demise, a SCS social essential for both patients and their family
I had fulfilled the wishes of my dear ones... worker facilitated a letter-writing activity to achieve a good closure.
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THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
COMPLETE
FACING THE
HOME
MOMENT
CARE
Better late than never Linda found closure
by finding the
St Luke’s Hospital’s chaplain, Esther Goh, reflects on
making a final farewell without regrets. courage to resolve
hen people learn that they are he penned his love for her. Tears welled in misunderstandings
W only left with a few months or
even weeks to live, they may
inadvertently face overwhelming
Linda’s eyes.
The reconciliation could have come earlier,
but it was better late than never. The simple
with her loved ones,
feelings, not knowing what to do. With the card provided closure for both mother and son.
clock ticking, it may be advisable to draft a to- Linda had a divorce and both her and also regained
do list when the emotions settle. One of these children were in their father’s custody.
things may be to look back on life and see if
there are any regrets one would like to address
The circumstances during that phase of
her life were complicated, causing many
meaning and purpose To “Live Well. Leave Well.”
before leaving. misunderstandings and much pain. Despite
In this article, I recall the story of Linda
(not her real name), 54, who had end-stage
loving her children deeply, the traditional
Asian mother did not know how to put her love
by reconnecting with I believe that reconciled relationships are important for both
the leaving and the living. For the leaving, it gives them a
sense of peace and harmony and enables them to leave
breast cancer. She found closure by finding the
courage to resolve misunderstandings with her
into words. As a result, their relationship was
strained over time. her faith before peacefully. Likewise, the bereaved will also experience inner
loved ones, and also regained meaning and Lying on her bed in the palliative ward,
peace and prevent any regret and guilt if they missed their
purpose by reconnecting with her faith before
the end-of-life.
Linda often thought about how she could have
handled the separation better. She wished she
the end-of-life. final opportunity to make good. Restored relationships
allow for mutual support, enabling the dying to feel loved,
It was Mother’s Day at the palliative ward. had done more to protect her children from and leaving precious memories for the bereaved.
Linda’s son made her a Mothers’ Day card, the emotional trauma and feelings of loss, Sometimes, all patients need is a little help. They may
the first one she had received in years. In it, abandonment and anger. After speaking to the chaplaincy team, Linda lack the courage to take the first step because they fear
was encouraged to have a heart-to-heart talk rejection. They may also be feeling overwhelmed as they
with her son. experience an onslaught of complex emotions such as
On one of her son’s visits, she took the sadness, anxiety and loneliness as they near the final phase
courage to start a conversation. Breaking the
of life.
silence, they reminisced about their happier
As chaplains, we care about the spiritual and emotional
times together. The connection was bridged.
well-being of our patients and their families. We can step
At the opportune moment, Linda took a leap
of faith and initiated the open and honest
in as a friend to better understand the misunderstanding
conversation that was long overdue. that caused the strained relationship. We can provide an
The air was cleared. Linda reassured her objective perspective and help both parties to connect in an
son that despite all the challenges they have open and honest conversation.
faced, she has and will always love him In my experience, patients who have made the conscious
unconditionally and irrevocably. She wished decision to make good and resolve misunderstandings
she had more time to make up for the lost
PHOTOS ESTHER GOH, CHAPLAIN, ST LUKE’S HOSPITAL & UNSPLASH
were able to embrace their death, and find peace with the
opportunities over the years, and will always inevitability of it.
cherish their memories together. It is a consolation to see a troubled face evolve into one
One month later, she passed on.
WORDS ESTHER GOH, CHAPLAIN, ST LUKE’S HOSPITAL that exudes peace.
In her last days, Linda made cards for her
children and even knitted a pair of booties
How to broach the topic?
and bonnet for her future grandson. These
gifts of love will give her loved ones something
Below are some ways to approach the situation if you have
to remember her by. an unresolved situation with someone who is terminally ill:
During her time at St Luke’s Hospital, • Start with a simple greeting
Linda also regained meaning and purpose • Make conversations about the things you have always
by reconnecting with her faith. A Catholic talked about together in the past
by marriage, Linda had no strong biblical • Have a heart-to-heart talk when the moment feels right
St Luke’s Hospital
chaplain Esther Goh
foundations and fell away from her faith after • Touch can be a powerful tool — holding their hands or
helps patients to the divorce. With the help of the chaplaincy giving a simple hug can sometimes be more powerful
reconcile relationships
and untie their spiritual
team, she strengthened her spiritual faith and than words
knots found the inner peace she yearned for.
It was a good goodbye.
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THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
SEEKING SANCTUARY
My hospice, Three weeks after Mr Leong
my home was admitted to the hospice, he
It’s possible to find fulfilment passed away peacefully at his
of one’s final wish in the most
unexpected of places. Dover Park newfound ‘home’ surrounded by
Hospice Medical Social Worker
Clara Kong shares how it was
his cherished ‘family’. We were
possible for one of her patients. thankful that Mr Leong managed
first met Mr Leong Siew Khai when
to fulfil his last and biggest
I he was admitted to Dover Park
Hospice with stage 4 lung cancer
on 4 November 2020. Mr Leong was
wish, which we were deeply
a single Chinese man in his 50s who had lived
alone in a rental flat for two years. His parents
honoured to be a part of.
had passed on and he had not been in contact
with his siblings for years.
As a last resort, Mr Leong chose to be admitted his wish was to belong here. As much as he to him, and that he deeply treasured the
to our hospice, even though he perceived was grateful to his friends who visited often, bonds he had forged with them. Each time
hospices as gloomy places. He had no other his friends had their families to go home to. his friends visited, he would always proudly
alternatives in receiving medical care, as he did Unlike them, he did not belong anywhere. He show them the photographs and referred to
not have a caregiver. felt empty and lost. us as his family.
Mr Leong was a rather quiet and reserved A few days after that conversation, we Mr Leong’s wish at his end of life was
man. Initially, it was extremely arduous for organised a Deepavali celebration for our simple — he wanted to be part of the
the care team to approach him as he was very patients and the team was pleasantly Dover Park Hospice family, a ‘Jia’ that he
guarded, refused to speak to the staff and would surprised! The once-cautious Mr Leong was had unexpectedly found at the darkest
rather we speak to his close friend regarding fervently dancing to the music and even moments of his days. He told me that he
his care plan instead. He had a mind of his own improvised the dance moves. The uplifting wanted all his treasured memories with
WORDS MEDICAL SOCIAL WORKER CLARA KONG, DOVER PARK HOSPICE
and would often be short-tempered due to the music and vibrant atmosphere had reminded the team to be shared, since this was one of
frustrations and discomfort brought on by him of his younger days at the discos and the most joyous times in his life. He wanted
his condition. it was the first time we had seen him with to let the world know that he had finally
The team decided to approach Mr Leong at a such a radiant smile. As the team danced found a sense of belonging for the first time
pace that he was comfortable with, conversing along with Mr Leong, he beamed and was in his life and was part of a family — the
with him regularly to explore how he was choked with tears. In his own words, he was Dover Park family. It was an extremely
settling in at the hospice. We encountered deeply moved and felt a sense of belonging emotional moment for the care team as
numerous setbacks but the team persisted for the first time in his life as he had always well and we fought back tears at Mr Leong’s
and gradually we noticed changes in him. He yearned for a family. He kept iterating to us words, remembering his initial hostility, his
stopped chasing us away and began to open up that we were his ‘jia’ (family in Mandarin)’ and eventual acceptance and finding a sense of
to us slowly, sharing his interests and life stories requested for photographs to be taken with familial belonging with the team.
PHOTOS DOVER PARK HOSPICE
with us. We learnt that Mr Leong was a devout the clinical team who cared for him, so that he Three weeks after Mr Leong was admitted
Buddhist who enjoyed mobile games and, more could fondly cherish all the memories he had to the hospice, he passed away peacefully
importantly, someone who really treasured his with the team. Mr Leong had also requested at his newfound ‘home’ surrounded by
relationships with the people around him. that I share these photographs on our social his cherished ‘family’. We were thankful
Mr Leong
On one occasion, I saw an opportunity to media platforms and to convey to all the non- that Mr Leong managed to fulfil his last celebrated
broach the topic of family with Mr Leong and Mandarin speaking staff that ‘jia’ in Mandarin and biggest wish, which we were deeply Deepavali with
his Dover Park
noticed tears welling up in his eyes. He felt that meant ‘family’. His intention was to let every honoured to be a part of. Thank you, Mr Hospice family
he had no ‘family’ as he had nowhere to go, and member of the team know what they mean Leong, for allowing us to be your ‘jia’. with much gusto
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THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
COMPLETE
ESSENCEHOME
OF LIFE
CARE
In his final days, the social encountered residents without Below: The fresh
Who are you caring for?
perspective
workers invited his family over. next-of-kin leave peacefully within needed at the
When his wife arrived, he pulled minutes. She has also witnessed end; Opposite
page: Keeping
the napkin out and passed it to her. residents, who having seen their the patients’
Some quiet moments passed while children graduate, struggle to pace in mind
she read his note. Simple, genuine accept that they have reached
Two care workers share their views on what is truly and beautiful. Eyes swelling, she the end.
important when it comes to a good goodbye. responded, “I forgive you.” She describes this time between
Rose explained, “The material is the first signs of dying and the and out of the residents and
not important. You can use fancy time of death to be the sacred our control.
we hesitate to leave their bedside. paper or a napkin. What’s important encounter between self and God. If we accept that we’re not
In providing care while protecting is how the resident and the family It is unknown to care workers and masters of death, but students of
self-care, should we pace ourselves are feeling.” As care workers, we not intended for us to get stress it, then this new posture might
against a resident’s prognosis or sometimes stress about giving the over and around. When Rose is shift the way we perceive and
simply do our best during our best to residents without checking called to the bedside of dying pace ourselves around residents.
work shifts? what is best for our residents. residents, she would give them It can help us navigate our own
Does the best come from the a gentle touch and, with a warm uncertainties and provide the
DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE logistics or from tending the heart voice, assure them that they are care that residents really need.
Tim’s children would not describe of our residents? not alone. When the day’s work is As leaders of nursing homes
him as a good father. He left his done, she passes the baton to the and hospices, timely debriefs or
wife and three children when they DIFFERENT POSTURE next care worker on duty. having a professional counselor
were at a tender age. Most days, The window between the first signs Working in a hospice, where can also ensure that care staff
he gambled. After his admission to of dying and the time of death death is often at the forefront, it receive sufficient support.
the home, his outpatient consults can range from minutes to weeks. might seem like you need to work
became opportunities to purchase a Rose, in her 10 years of experience around the time of death. But the Names have been changed
4D or TOTO ticket. as a pastoral care worker, has final moments are uncertain to protect confidentiality
Rose, our pastoral care staff,
befriended him from his first
day. They would talk about lucky
numbers, his roommates and
on occasion, the pain he was feeling.
esidents arrive in Valerie would wait until Mak Lian He never spoke about his family.
R a nursing home
and hospice with
a prognosis. With
had swallowed her food. During
lull moments, Valerie would come
by Mak Lian’s side to smoothen her
Throughout his time in
the home, only his youngest
daughter visited him.
this in mind, care staff strive to clothing and gently pat her hands. One quiet afternoon, Rose asked
meet residents where they are, to Over the years, Mak Lian and him, “How do you feel about leaving
empathise and provide comfort care. Valerie developed a special bond. your family?” Softly but with
However, when faced with our Mak Lian would eat more when certainty, he replied, “I let my wife
residents’ deaths, care staff are also Valerie was with her. Mak Lian would down.” She then shared with him
challenged with our own thoughts also keep snacks for Valerie. that in the final moments, the “四道:
and feelings about it. This special connection was 道謝 、道愛、道歉、道別” (Translated
WORDS SHEREEN NG, COMMUNITY PARTNERSHIP & COMMUNICATIONS,
What happens when we are at abruptly shaken when Mak Lian’s to mean: Thank you, I love you, I am
a different pace or have a different condition rapidly deteriorated. Mak sorry and goodbye) were difficult
perspective as residents? How Lian passed away the weekend that but important conversations to have.
does that affect our care and our Valerie was not working. Since his wife never visited him, he
own lives? Valerie could not accept that Mak decided to write her a letter.
Lian was gone. During one of her Deftly, Rose pulled a clean napkin
ST. JOSEPH’S HOME PHOTOS ST. JOSEPH’S HOME
DIFFERENT PACE daily duties, she was asked, “I know from her pocket. She did not have
Mak Lian had a lively spirit but you took care of Mak Lian while fancy paper or multicoloured pens.
she was non-verbal. Most days, the she was around. How are you With the clean napkin and the
nurses heard nothing more than feeling?” Right there and then, she nearest ballpoint pen she could find,
a grunt or an occasional shriek started sobbing. She steadied herself she wrote down his message: “I am
from her. She also had the habit against the wall and muttered, “So sorry for letting you down. Please
of sporadically reaching out to fast. So fast.” forgive me. I love you.”
grab and pull others. Nurses who As care workers, we might not Tim folded this recycled napkin,
assisted her at meal times needed to expect residents to go quite so with his precious message, and
be alert to such behaviour. quickly. Seeing them day in day tucked it in his shirt pocket. For
One nursing staff, Valerie, was out, we might get the unrealistic the next few weeks, it remained
responsible for tending to her during expectation that they will be here unread, but the care staff could
meal times. Each bite took time and every day. Or in their final moments, see his relaxed demeanour.
10 11
THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
SHC 25TH ANNIVERSARY
A Silver Jubilee 25TH ANNIVERSARY AWARDS
AND APPRECIATION DAY
to remember Hosted by CNA938 Presenter Susan Ng at
the Shangri-La Hotel Singapore on 26 March,
the SHC 25th Anniversary Awards and
Singapore Hospice Council celebrates 25 years of the hospice and palliative Appreciation Day celebrated SHC’s significant
milestone and honoured the pioneers, past
care movement in Singapore with a 25th Anniversary Awards and chairpersons and member organisations of
Appreciation Day and a Silver Jubilee Charity Show. SHC for their valuable contributions to the
hospice movement. During the event, SHC
Chairperson Dr Patricia Neo presented key
1 Guests writing their
ingapore Hospice Council (SHC) ahead, SHC will continue to work closely findings from SHC’s recent survey with 2,326 5
well wishes for SHC at the
S has come a long way since its
formation in May 1995 with
the goal of providing palliative
with the Ministry of Health to enhance
access, affordability and consistent
quality of palliative care services.
registration booth
2 Emcee Susan Ng welcoming
guests to the event
3 The Guest-of-Honour and
healthcare professionals. Results revealed that
there was about 20% increase in palliative care
awareness among healthcare professionals in
care education for volunteers, nurses and Singapore President Halimah Yacob Welcome Party. From left to Singapore, and affirmed a need for continual
right: (1st row) SHC Honorary
doctors. As an umbrella body, the Council graced the 25th Anniversary Awards and Secretary and Chairman of the and targeted training to prepare them to care
represents 25 member organisations that Appreciation Day as Guest of Honour, 25th Anniversary Celebration for patients with life-threatening illnesses. To
Organising Committee Dr Wu
actively provide hospice and palliative with her congratulatory speech on Huei Yaw, Guest-of-Honour close this momentous occasion, SHC unveiled
care for the terminally ill and their families SHC’s milestone broadcasted during Madam President Halimah its Vision and Mission statements.
Yacob, SHC Chairperson
in Singapore. SHC has also taken on the virtual Charity Show. She expressed Dr Patricia Neo; (2nd row)
important roles of shaping policy, training her gratitude to all the palliative care SHC Vice-Chairman Dr Chong Vision: Quality palliative care for everyone
Poh Heng, SHC Honorary
healthcare professionals, overseeing quality professionals for their dedication and Treasurer Mr Chey Chor Wai, Mission: Be the collective voice of the
improvement programmes, educating the tireless efforts in taking care of patients SHC Chief Executive palliative care community to advance public
Ms Evelyn Leong
public on palliative care and end-of-life with life-threatening illnesses and 4 Dr Patricia Neo delivering understanding and champion for quality
care planning, and fundraising. In the years their families. her opening speech palliative care services
1 2 6 7 8
3
5 Associate Professor Cynthia
9 10
Goh, senior consultant at the
WORDS & PHOTOS SINGAPORE HOSPICE COUNCIL
Division of Supportive and
Palliative Care in the National
Cancer Centre Singapore, receiving
her Token of Appreciation from
4
Madam President and Dr Wu
Huei Yaw. She was among 36
award recipients
6 7 Madam President and
Distinguished Guests watching the
tribute clips in honour of SHC’s
pioneers past and present
8 Madam President, Dr Patricia
Neo and Ms Evelyn Leong
launching SHC’s Vision and
Mission statements
9 Dr Patricia Neo presenting the
Token of Appreciation to Madam
President for gracing this event
10 Guests taking their leave after
receiving an afternoon tea bento set
12 13
THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
SHC 25TH ANNIVERSARY
SILVER JUBILEE CHARITY SHOW
The SHC Silver Jubilee Charity Show held on
27 March and hosted by Miss Universe Singapore 11
2019 second runner-up Cheryl Yao was live streamed
on SISTIC’s virtual platform. Guests enjoyed a special
dinner at home prepared by the Shangri-La Hotel,
1 2 while watching a variety of stellar performances. The
charity show was part of SHC’s fundraising efforts
to continue its advocacy work in providing palliative
1 A lovely pre-show
3
care education and training for doctors, nurses, allied
performance from pianist
Joshua German health professionals and the public so that more
2 A warm welcome from
people will have access to better quality of life leading
emcee Cheryl Yao
3 Opening address by to a dignified end-of-life journey.
Madam President conveying SHC would like to express their deepest
her support for SHC and the
palliative care sector appreciation to all performing artistes, sponsors,
4 5 6 “Life” is a song 12
donors and partners for making this show possible.
composed and performed
by Mr Mohamed Abdullah
Alhabshee & First Fusion
band, singer Tan Yu Qing
and four veteran DJs from
11 Five members of EVOKX Youth Choir
VintageRadio.SG
singing “We Will Rise Again” and “The
4 Music’s Always There With You”
12 Three students from NUS Yong Siew
Toh Conservatory of Music playing “Eric
Ewazen Trio for Horn, Violin, and Piano:
III. Andante Grazioso”, inspired by a
Dover Park Hospice patient’s artworks
13 Three groups of young performers
from Pipa Society Singapore playing
“赶花会”, “阳春白雪” and “火把节之夜”
14 Actor Nick Shen, an active volunteer
at one of SHC’s member organisations,
with his mask-changing performance and
rendition of popular Chinese song “朋友”
15 Daniel Ong, winner of SHC’s 2019 13
Voices of My HeART Songwriting
Competition, presenting his winning piece 14
“阿嬷的歌”, inspired by SHC’s Life Book
publication Granny Cool
16 Veteran singer, actress, performer and 15 16
VintageRadio.SG DJ Rahimah Rahim
performing “Let Me Be There”
17 Closing the show, second-runner up
5 6
of the popular singing competition, Sing!
China, Joanna Dong performing her
original songs “Close To You”, “You Gotta
Be” and “A Good Goodbye”
7 8 18 With your kind donations, SHC
delivered bento meals and hampers*
to the patients, caregivers and healthcare
workers of Assisi Hospice, Dover Park
Hospice, St. Andrew’s Community
Hospital, St Joseph’s Home and
St Luke’s Hospital
*sponsored by Borden Company
(Private) Limited
Support SHC in their efforts
to transform the healthcare
7 Sand artist Tan Sock Fong illustrating the landscape and empower the
rich story of SHC, from its humble beginnings general public to proactively look
till present day into their palliative care needs.
8 Dr Alex Su, Vice-Chairman of the Medical 10
Board (Clinical Quality) at Institute of Mental Visit singaporehospice.org.sg
Health, singing the Chinese classic “城里的月光” or contribute towards SHC’s
9 Yu Qing, second runner-up of SHC 2019
fundraising efforts at
Voices of My HeART Songwriting Competition, fundraise.singaporehospice.org.sg
singing her song “Journey”, echoing the feelings of
palliative care professionals and volunteers
who have served selflessly
10 MADDSpace duo Rybelle with their hip-hop 17 18
dance number “Shake-It-Up” 9
14 15
THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
LEAVING FROM HOME
With the support of her
Better family and care team,
and better, Madam Salmah was
day by day able to find gratitude in
the peace her husband
Madam Salmah retraced her
husband’s last journey and received at the end.
how she found the peace in
acceptance and gratitude.
From top: Madam
Salmah with the photo
album she made of her
adam Salmah Beevi bte Kader has caregiving journey;
Madam Salmah keeping
M been married to Mr Abu Bakar
bin Kunju Baba for 43 years and
they were inseparable. Mr Abu
up Mr Abu Bakar’s
grooming routine; The
loving couple; (from
left) Senior Medical
Bakar was a protective husband who insisted Social Worker Lim
Li Ying, Resident
on accompanying Madam Salmah everywhere. Physician Dr Tan Shu
At the same time, he also encouraged her to determined to be the best caregiver she could This is very meaningful for Muslims, said Zhen, Senior Staff
Nurse Thila
do whatever she wanted. “He never ever said be. In fact, the whole family was committed to Madam Salmah. “It is the day Muslims pray before
‘no’ to me. He did everything for me,” recalled meeting Mr Abu Bakar’s needs, from cooking his the fasting month. We pray and hope to die on
Madam Salmah. favourite meals to keeping him well-groomed. that day, during that month.”
However, in 2015, Mr Abu Bakar’s health The family made it a particular point to respect Nevertheless, it was a painful separation
started to decline. Eventually, he had to stop Mr Abu Bakar’s wishes to be as independent as for her. “I sat with him until the morning. I was
working and underwent as many as nine possible. For as long as he was able, he did not very heartbroken.”
ballooning procedures and a heart bypass wear adult diapers. Instead, his grandchildren Li Ying provided support and counselling to
surgery to treat the blockages in his heart. Four accompanied him when he went to the washroom Madam Salmah with a home visit and phone calls.
years later, his health troubles culminated in to make sure he was safe. She also referred Madam Salmah to a counselling
a diagnosis of end-stage kidney failure. It was service by Montfort Care Grief Matters to help her
then that he and his family were referred to the TIGHTENING FAMILY BONDS cope with her grief and to come to terms with her
Ageing-in-Place (AIP) palliative care service at One of the things that have bolstered Mr Abu husband’s passing.
Yishun Health (YH). Bakar’s spirit during his last days was his family With the support of her family and care team,
Through this service, Mr Abu Bakar received growing closer. Their two daughters set aside Madam Salmah was able to find gratitude in the
regular home visits from Resident Physician a long-held misunderstanding, which brought peace her husband received at the end. She made
WORDS TAN SHI HUI, EXECUTIVE, POPULATION HEALTH AND
Dr Tan Shu Zhen and Senior Staff Nurse joy and comfort to Mr Abu Bakar. “He loved the a photo album documenting this journey and gave
PHOTOS TAN SHI HUI, MADAM SALMAH BEEVI BTE KADER
Thilagavathy d/o Muthusamy (Thila). They children so much,” shared Madam Salmah. “Since Thila a copy. At Deepavali last year, she also made
worked together with Madam Salmah to manage young, he would never scold them. Just a little bit, kueh and cookies for the AIP team. This honoured
COMMUNITY TRANSFORMATION, YISHUN HEALTH
his symptoms, which ranged from swelling, to once in a while. And he would do anything for her husband’s wish which was to thank them for
wounds and injuries. In addition, Senior Medical the grandchildren.” their care and support with homebaked goodies.
Social Worker Lim Li Ying provided psychosocial One of the happiest periods for Mr Abu Bakar “It was very painful to see him suffering until
and emotional support, and connected the was when the couple moved in with their eldest the last day. When the doctor came every week
family to financial assistance schemes to relieve daughter, Jannah, for three months. Everyone to review his condition, it had helped me to be
the burden of his medical expenses. would gather in her spacious house for meals. strong so that I could take care of him better, day
Every day, Madam Salmah would diligently by day. They encouraged me to do whatever I
record her husband’s vital signs in a worksheet A PEACEFUL GOODBYE can. I’m really satisfied with what the doctors and
and show it to Dr Tan and Thila when they On 22 April 2020, Madam Salmah spent the day nurses have done for my husband in Khoo Teck
made their visit. Madam Salmah also learned to alone with Mr Abu Bakar. She laid down beside Puat Hospital. I’ve always tried to take care of
administer Mr Abu Bakar’s medications. him and prayed with him. He passed away my husband until his last breath. Thank God for
From the time when she learned of her peacefully, resting on her arm. It was the day the opportunity that he died on my arm,” shared
husband’s prognosis, Madam Salmah was before Ramadan. Madam Salmah.
16 17
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BITTERSWEET ENDINGS
Left: Mr Su at Outram
Community Hospital
A father’s last bus ride
Below: Mr Su with
daughter Sok Khim on
her wedding day
Opposite page:
Mr Su selling fish at
the market
A year has passed since Su Sok Khim’s father left the family. Yet, the memory of his
last days with her at Outram Community Hospital stay strongly intact in her mind.
a… why can’t you wait a few
“P
more minutes for me to say
‘thank you’ and ‘goodbye’,” cried
Sok Khim.
She was too late. He was already gone by the
time she arrived.
She stood crying in the ward. The nurse next
to her was saying something, but she could
not hear her. Everything seems blurry as she
looked at the motionless body of her father.
THE SOLE BREADWINNER HAPPY FINAL DAYS
Mr Su was the epitome of a Teochew father Mr Su was admitted for palliative care at
— he was a man of few words, strict with Outram Community Hospital (OCH). Sok
his ways and was the sole breadwinner of Khim would visit him every day to bring
the family. him meals as he enjoyed home-cooked food.
As a fishmonger, Mr Su’s routine started as “I told my father that I wasn’t as good
early as five in the morning, when he would as him when it comes to cooking but he
travel from Holland Drive to go to the fishery did not mind at all. Yet, I would see him
port in Jurong. By 7 o’clock, he would have pouring a lot of soy sauce in his food to
started earning his daily wage at Jalan Bukit enhance the flavour,” laughed Sok Khim.
Merah’s wet market. His day at work usually To fulfil his final wish to be home, Khim
ended before two in the afternoon. He would and her family requested for the Outram
then go home to rest and go out again to meet “My father did not earn a lot. His salary Community Hospital (OCH) palliative team
his friends in the evening. On busier days, depended on the seasons and if he had to arrange for home leave.
especially weekends, the family would spend enough fish to sell,” shared Sok Khim. “Planning for home leave for Mr Su was
time together by helping him at the stall. Sometimes, Mr Su did not open his stall challenging because of COVID-19. We were
because he was short of cash to buy fish. also worried about his condition and had
Life was a struggle for them and because Van Houten chocolates were a luxury for to have an ambulance ready to prepare
of this, her parents would often get into her family. for any emergency,” shared Sandy Koh,
heated arguments. She also remembers her father’s culinary Principal Medical Social Worker at OCH.
But that never stopped Mr Su from putting skills. Mr Su was a talented cook — he The few hours were very valuable for
food on the table for his family. often remembered what he ate outside and Mr Su and his family. He slept on his bed,
“
would prepare those dishes for his family. watched television, ate some steamed buns
PRECIOUS MOMENTS From buying ingredients to cooking the and drank his favourite Kopi O. They were
When Sok Khim was seven, the family had dishes, Mr Su would do them all by himself. simple activities but the family saw Mr Su
to relocate temporarily due to Housing He had many specialities — chilli crab, enjoying those short moments.
WORDS & PHOTOS OUTRAM COMMUNITY HOSPITAL
Development Board’s redevelopment plan. salted vegetable duck and curry chicken — Three weeks later, at the age of 82, he
Mr Su has finally For three years, Sok Khim was under her
grandmother’s care because she lived near
but the one that Sok Khim still misses most
is his pork knuckles jelly, a dish that’s not
passed away peacefully in the ward.
His daughter only turned up moments
her primary school. Mr Su would fetch easy to find nowadays. after his passing.
decided to board the her on Friday nights to spend time with
the family, and then send her back to her
A father’s love is beyond words, running
deep and expressed through actions.
During the last few weeks of his life, Mr
Su shared with the care team that he kept
bus. He always liked grandmother’s on Sundays. The moments
spent riding in his scooter’s sidecar were
Things went down south when Mr Su
had a fall one day and was brought to the
seeing a bus passing through in his single
room. He told the staff that he would need
precious to Sok Khim. polyclinic. He had also been complaining to catch the bus and knew that it would
to do things at his “My father would buy Van Houten chocolates
from the provision shops along Holland
of consistent coughing. Upon further
examination, the family eventually found
bring him away.
“Mr Su has finally decided to board the
Village to prevent me from crying when it out that he was suffering from end-stage bus. He always liked to do things at his own
own pace.” was time to go back,” shared Sok Khim. lung cancer. pace,” said Sandy.
18 19
THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021ONE LAST TOUCH
The final wish To Madam Chan, the
reunion was important as
prepare gifts for him instead. Although not
many words were exchanged during the
visit, Madam Chan and her son cried and
hugged each other. Madam Chan shared
Relationships are critical to our existence, especially during end-of-life. with her son that her time was short but
reminded him that she would always want
Many patients’ wishes are linked to reunions and reconciliations with she had a chance to see her him to be well taken care of, and to listen
their loved ones. Assisi Hospice’s Psychosocial Support team shares to his carers in the nursing home. The visit
two stories about fulfilling such wishes. son and hug him again. was short, and the PSS team helped to take
photos for them as keepsakes.
After the reunion, Madam Chan placed the
photo of herself and her son by her bedside,
HER LAST WISH reminiscing about the day they reunited till
Madam Chan (name has been changed) she passed on. To Madam Chan, the reunion
was admitted to Assisi Hospice in April was important as she had a chance to see
2020 with breast and ovarian cancer. She her son and hug him again.
was 71 years old and her wish was to
reunite with her son whom she had not HELPING HIM TO PEN A LETTER
seen in 20 years. Fifty-one-year-old Mr P (name has been
After journeying with Madam Chan for a changed) was in a destitute home before
few months, Assisi’s medical social worker he was diagnosed with mouth cancer and
realised that she often talked about her admitted to Assisi Hospice. His parents and
past and her regrets, especially about the one of his siblings have passed on. He had
son whom she was unable to care for. lost touch with his sole surviving brother
However, she only remembered her son’s about 10 years ago. One of his wishes was
full name, and that he had been sent to an to be reunited with his brother.
institution more than 20 years ago. Hence, Mr P had a tracheostomy tube, and it
she did not request to meet her son as she was difficult for him to talk. He shared
felt that it would be impossible to track that he could not write. He was not able
him down. to remember his brother’s identification
Nonetheless, Assisi’s Psychosocial number and the spelling of his brother’s
Support (PSS) team decided to take on name. He was also unsure about his
this ‘mission impossible’. After speaking brother’s previous contact details.
further to Madam Chan and her sister, the Our medical social worker spoke to
medical social worker found out that her the destitute home who looked after him
son could be staying in a welfare home previously to explore if they had any details
in Hougang. The entire PSS team was of his brother. She also tried searching on
activated and reached out to the Destitute the internet and social media. However, she
Persons Service. After three weeks, the PSS was unable to trace his brother.
team managed to locate Madam Chan’s Our medical social worker asked him
son in a nursing home. what he would say to his brother if he
Madam Chan was surprised that the managed to see him, and helped to pen his
team managed to locate her son and words in a letter. He just wanted to wish
teared up when she heard the news. his brother “good luck, and a good life”.
The team then arranged for a video call Even though he didn’t manage to meet his
WORDS ASSISI HOSPICE PHOTO FREEPIK.COM
between mother and son. Seeing that they brother, penning the letter helped him to
were so moved to see each other, the PSS feel more settled.
team made plans for the son to have a He also felt unsettled spiritually. As he
face-to-face visit with Madam Chan. was a Hindu, Assisi Hospice’s Pastoral Care
The face-to-face reunion happened staff arranged for a Hindu priest to visit
during the COVID-19 pandemic. Special and pray for him. Assisi’s social worker
arrangements were made for Madam also helped him to reconnect with a case
Chan’s son to visit her in Assisi Hospice. manager from his previous destitute home,
Before the reunion, Madam Chan was Reaching who gave assurance that he would help to
very excited and requested that the team across the years perform prayers for him in a Hindu temple
lost for a last
help her prepare chicken rice for her reunion is wish a year after he passed on, according to his
son. However, as her son had dietary fulfilled indeed faith. Mr P thus gained peace of mind before
restrictions, the PSS team helped to passing on.
20 21
THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021XXXXXX 22 23 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021 THE HOSPICE LINK • JUNE – AUGUST 2021
YOUTH OUTREACH
Leading youth in action
In March 2021, Singapore Hospice Planning, and spent time interacting
Council (SHC) initiated storytelling with residents and staff of the
sessions for the second-year students MWS centres.
from Anglo-Chinese Junior College Students were encouraged to
(ACJC) as part of the school’s Values share their reflections on their SHC
in Action project. SHC’s objective is to workshop experience. “Through
increase awareness of palliative care meeting the staff of Singapore
through available resources, with Hospice Council, as well as the
which the students and teachers staff and residents at the MWS
can then use for their outreach Senior Centre, I have learned about
programme. ACJC is the first school palliative care and gained a better
to conduct story-telling sessions for understanding of how to tackle
seniors on palliative care. difficult questions surrounding
The SHC workshop for these ACJC death,” wrote Pow Shu Qi. “Although
students included the sharing of the it was difficult initially to converse For example, I never knew that
heartwarming story Granny Cool, with the residents because of the we had to choose a spokesperson
published by SHC, with seniors at language barrier, we were able to to speak for us should we be
Methodist Welfare Services (MWS) overcome this challenge by being unconscious or unable to make
Senior Centres at four locations. open-minded and unafraid to seek decisions for ourselves. Overall,
Inspired by a true life story, Granny help from the staff at the Centre. this experience not only taught
Cool is about how an elderly patient We were keen to learn more about me the importance of thinking for
and her granddaughter, who was these residents and we had fun my future, it has also equipped
also her caregiver, have sought conversing with them.” me with skills that I would need to
comfort and support through Her classmate Angelina Tan talk about death issues. I have also
palliative care. Students were also wrote: “Personally, I have learnt gained greater confidence now in
introduced to End-of-Life Care the importance of planning ahead. interacting with our seniors.”
EDITORIAL COMMITTEE Upcoming Events
Editor Christina Wee JULY - SEPTEMBER 2021
Associate Editor Anne Loh SHC “Live Well. Leave Well.”: All you need to know about
Palliative Care Talk
Alexandra Hospital Yvonne Lee Join us for an informative session to understand palliative
Assisi Hospice Angela Yeo care and end-of-life matters. The session also aims to increase
Buddhist Compassion Relief Kwek Jingyi awareness of the attitude towards death and its impact on the
Tzu Chi Foundation (Singapore) willingness to converse with family or loved ones.
Changi General Hospital Rasidah bte Alias
Dover Park Hospice Jenny Goo Time: 2.00pm - 3.30pm
HCA Hospice Care Toh Wei Shi Venue: Online via Zoom
Khoo Teck Puat Hospital Tricia Tan Contact: contact@singaporehospice.org.sg
Lien Centre for Palliative Care Tang Swee Noi Registration*: https://tinyurl.com/shctalks21eng
Metta Hospice Care Cecilia Soh *Please indicate your interest in the link and we will contact you
MWS Home Care & Home Hospice Michelle Aw Yong via email.
Ren Ci Hospital Sharon Tan
The Palliative Care Centre for Tan Li Kuan SHC @ National Library Singapore*
Excellence in Research and Education Explore and learn more about palliative care and
Sengkang General Hospital Farah Rahman end-of-life care planning through infographics, stories
Singapore Cancer Society Kumudha Panneerchelvam and printed resources.
Singapore General Hospital Mavis Law
Singapore Hospice Council Sheena Koong Date: 1 June - 31 July 2021
SingHealth Community Hospitals Muhammad Azhar bin Venue: Marine Parade Public Library
Abdul Rahim Level 3, 278 Marine Parade Rd, #01-02 Community Building,
St Andrew’s Community Hospital Peh Lay Koon S(449282)
St Joseph’s Home Shereen Ng
St Luke’s Hospital Chua Hwee Leng Date: 1 August - 30 September 2021
Tan Tock Seng Hospital Candice Tan Venue: Toa Payoh Public Library
Tsao Foundation Desiree Lim Level 1, 6 Toa Payoh Central, S(319191)
Design Christian Subrata *In view of the COVID-19 situation, please check our website
Printer Yung Shung Printrade Pte Ltd www.singaporehospice.org.sg for updates.
1 Lorong 2 Toa Payoh #07-00, Braddell House, S (319637) Quotation or reproduction of content without the prior written
T: 6538 2231 • E: secretariat@singaporehospice.org.sg permission of the Singapore Hospice Council is prohibited.
www.singaporehospice.org.sg Movement for the Intellectually Disabled of Singapore (MINDS)
students assisted with the mailing process of this issue.
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