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4/25/19
NEVER
51%
WRESTLE
WITH PIGS
Dealing with Difficult
Workplace Personalities
L. Lavon Gray, PhD
www.CreativeBread.studio
State of the American Workplace, 2017
Your success or failure
as a leader will be primarily
determined by
ONE
PEOPLE SKILLS
#1 Skills Gap in U.S. thing…
your ability to build meaningful
RELATIONSHIPS
Workforce Report, April 2018
1
4/25/19
Name that Name that
PIG PIG
Name that Name that
PIG PIG
“I learned a long time
ago to
NEVER
wrestle with a pig…
Name that You both get
DIRTY
PIG and the pig
LIKES it.”
- George Bernard Shaw
2
4/25/19
7 Pig Personalities GOAL
To get their way…
no matter what.
The Wild Boar • Arrogant, abusive,
The Warthog aggressive and
intimidating
The Pot-Belly Pig
• Constantly interrupt
The Haughty Pig • Minimize other
The Sow people’s
contributions
The Piglet The Wild Boar • Ready to attack
Wilber the Pig (The Bully)
The
Johnson
Treatment
3
4/25/19
The Wild Boar
(The Bully)
ACTION PLAN
• Interrupt the attack
• Say their name over and over
again
• Maintain eye contact
• Control your voice
Things Warthogs Say…
GOAL
To undermine without • “I’m not mad”
being obvious
• ”Fine” or “Whatever”
• Insults veiled as • “You’ve done well for a person
compliments with your education level”
• Innuendos
• “I didn’t know you meant now”
• Silent treatment
• Skilled at the old “knife- • “I thought you knew”
The Warthog in-the-back” routine
• “I was only joking”
(The Passive-Aggressive)
• “Why are you getting so upset?”
GOAL
The Warthog To make everyone
(The Passive-Aggressive) happy
ACTION PLAN • Sociable, lovable
• Calm down and agreeable
• Directly address specific • Say ‘yes’ to
behaviors…face to face everything
• Ask questions • Overcommit,
resentful, unreliable
• Be firm and set limits
The Pot-belly Pig • Eventually meltdown
(The People Pleaser)
4
4/25/19
The Pot-belly Pig
(The People Pleaser)
ACTION PLAN
• Build trust
• Highlight that the “can’t say no”
attitude comes from a good place
• Address specific instances where
their quality of work has suffered
• Coach boundaries The Haughty Pig
(The Know-It-All)
GOAL
To get their ideas
implemented…
because they know
“Are you incapable of best
restraining yourself or
do you take pride in • Knowledgeable…and
they know it
being an insufferable
• Monopolize
Know-it-All?” meetings
- Professor Severus Snape
• Shift blame
The Haughty Pig • Paint inaccurate
pictures
(The Know-It-All)
GOAL
The Haughty Pig For someone to listen
(The Know-It-All)
• Complain about
ACTION PLAN everything
• Recognize them as an expert • See problems as
worse than they are
• Point them to new ideas
• Offering solutions
• “Maybe” “Perhaps” makes them whine
“I was just wondering” more
• Enlist their help
The Sow • “Misery loves
company”
(The Whiner)
5
4/25/19
GOAL
They want a seat at
the table
The Sow
(The Whiner) • Crave respect and
admiration from
ACTION PLAN others
• Reframe the situation • Present themselves
as experts – but they
• Focus on solutions aren't really experts
• Call it out at all
• Have lots of ideas,
• Use “bridging”
The Piglet but lack experience
or growth
(The Want-to-Be Expert) • Not defined by age
The Piglet
(The Want-to-Be Expert) GOAL
To make a difference
ACTION PLAN • Has a grasp on reality
• Be open to their ideas • Continually developing
• Focus on mentoring • Embraces change
• Establish clear expectations • Understands limitations
• Provide honest feedback
Wilbur the Pig
(The Ideal Employee)
Wilbur the Pig
(The Ideal Employee)
ACTION PLAN
• Celebrate wins
www.CreativeBread.studio/TakeTheTest
• Create opportunities for quality
relationship building
• Make communication a priority
• Focus on collaborative problem-
solving
6
4/25/19
G.V. “Sonny”
“You can have Montgomery
(August 5, 1920 – May 12, 2006)
EVERYTHING
in life you want • U.S. House of Representatives:
if you will just help enough 1967–1997
OTHER PEOPLE • Veteran’s Affairs Committee,
Chairman
get what they want.” • Presidential Medal of Freedom,
- Zig Ziglar 2005
Your success or failure
as a leader will be primarily
determined by
ONE
thing…
your ability to build meaningful
RELATIONSHIPS
- Dr. L. Lavon Gray
www.CreativeBread.studio/TakeTheTest
7
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